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WAYS OF STYLE

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GRIEVING A DOG – FAREWELL MY LITTLE TOTO

in Lifestyle on 04/16/18

You guys have no idea how bad I’ve been postponing to write this painful post. But, if something I’ve learned over time and after going through a hard situation, is that there’s other people going through the same and you never know how your situation can help someone else.

Today, I want to share with you what happened to Toto and how we’ve been dealing with grief. I know it may sound a little dramatic to some people, but honestly, if you’ve never had a dog, it’s not possible to understand how painful it is when they are no longer with you. It’s like losing a family member.

On March 30th our little baby Toto passed away due to a heart failure. Our hearts are still broken and right now I doubt I’ll ever recover. It feels like I will never be the same again. It’s like a part of me died with my dog.

He was my best friend for almost 13 years. He was next to me during the hardest times of my life and it breaks my heart that he won’t be during the happiest times to come. He hated winter so much and LOVED summer and I still can’t believe he won’t be here to enjoy the warmer months in Chicago. This is the first time I have to deal so close with death and it really sucks. I had no idea it was going to affect me this bad.

I wish I could give you advice on how to get over losing your pet, but at this point I can’t. I cry every day and I miss him every minute. Dogs and I think pets in general, have this unique ability to love you no matter what. They always forget the bad and they’re always happy to see you. They are so grateful and selfless. Their pure and innocent love is an example of how we should love others too.

I think that’s why we miss them so much after they’re gone. It’s really hard to find that kind of love.

I can’t stop thinking of his last day with us. We thought he ate some food we spilled the night before, and thought his tummy was hurting, so we didn’t even think of taking him to the vet until 9 pm when he fainted and that’s when we got really scared. Even before leaving the apartment, I knew he was going to die. It’s the worst feeling in the world.

There was something in his eyes and the way he looked at me. We took him to the ER, but it was too late. His lungs were filled with fluids and they couldn’t stabilize him. We received that nasty call at 2 in the morning saying that he had stopped breathing.

Because I’m a super optimistic person, I tried to comfort myself with the good side of all of this. Like, now I won’t have allergies, or no one wakes me up in the morning. No one asks me for food while I’m eating and I don’t have to worry about who will stay with him if we travel. Little did I know that all of these things are the ones I miss the most… along with the good things of course. There’s just no good side on losing your best friend and that’s just how it is.

So, little Toto, wherever you are, I hope we will be reunited one day. I loved you so much and I’m so sorry for not knowing what was going on. Thank you so much for loving me like you did, with all the bad and good. Thank you for being there. You changed my life and made me a much better human. Thank you for all the laughs and for all your craziness.

I miss you every day and I hope one day I learn how to live without you buddy.

As a Christian, there’s always the hope and the idea of heaven, and I’m truly counting that I’ll meet my little baby in heaven one day. Thank you to all of our friends and you guys for your love and messages of support. You have no idea how much your words have helped us move forward.

I’m doing my best, so please bare with me. If you’ve been through something similar and have any kind of advice on how to deal with this, please share in the comments below.

Sending you guys so much love back! Thank you for stopping by my blog!

XO,
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Comments

  1. Monica says

    April 26, 2018 at 10:52 am

    Hi Aimara
    I am deeply saddened by the news of your loss. I pray that God will grant you the strength. My most sincere condolences. Stay strong and cherish all those memories of him! Rest in peace Toto. May your heart and soul continue to shine Aimara!
    Both of my parents passed away and I have to deal with challenges along with heartaches it’s not an easy task to grieve. I understand dealing with death it not a pleasant experience it’s very sad an emotional chapter in your life and you will also deal with depression it’s part of healing and grieving process. We have to remain brave and strong as much as we can tell God to give us strength. So hang in there!

    Reply
    • Ways Of Style says

      May 11, 2018 at 9:59 am

      Thank you so much for your kind works Monica. You have no idea how much they help and mean to me!
      I’m so sorry for your loss. I can’t even imagine what that must be like. I’m praying for you, so you have strength during this difficult time. You hang in there too.
      Thanks again for these sweet words!
      Hope you enjoy your weekend!
      XO
      Aimara

      Reply
  2. Suzanne says

    April 20, 2018 at 9:41 am

    This was so hard to read. It took me back to when I lost my dog 🙁
    You’re in my prayers girl. SO SORRY!!
    XX

    Reply
    • Ways Of Style says

      April 20, 2018 at 10:29 am

      Thank you so much Suzanne!
      XO
      Aimara

      Reply
  3. Jess says

    April 20, 2018 at 9:06 am

    I’m so sorry for your loss.
    I know how hard it is girl. I will keep you in my prayers ??

    Reply
    • Ways Of Style says

      April 20, 2018 at 10:28 am

      Thanks sweet girl. This really means the world to me!
      XO
      Aimara

      Reply
  4. Ben says

    April 17, 2018 at 2:21 pm

    I have no words. I’m very sorry for your loss Aimara ??

    Reply
    • Ways Of Style says

      April 20, 2018 at 10:28 am

      Thank you so much Ben!
      XO
      Aimara

      Reply
  5. Jennifer Quattrucci says

    April 17, 2018 at 11:58 am

    I am truly sorry for your loss. Toto was an extraordinary pet and friend and I too believe you will meet him again. Thank you so much for sharing your world and especially the things that mean the most. You are a true inspiration.

    Reply
    • Ways Of Style says

      April 20, 2018 at 10:27 am

      Thank you so much sweet friend.
      I hope you’re right. I miss him SO much!
      XO
      Aimara

      Reply
  6. Stephanie says

    April 17, 2018 at 10:47 am

    I am so sorry! I always loved seeing Toto on your IG and stories.
    Hope you recover soon. This was a very sweet post ??
    Sending you much love Aimara!!

    Reply
    • Ways Of Style says

      April 20, 2018 at 10:10 am

      Aww thanks girl!
      I really appreciate it. We really miss the little guy!
      XO
      Aimara

      Reply
  7. Alyssa says

    April 17, 2018 at 10:46 am

    Legit crying! My heart is with you ❤️

    Reply
    • Ways Of Style says

      April 20, 2018 at 10:09 am

      I’m sorry I made you cry! 🙁
      Thanks for your sweet words girl!
      XO
      Aimara

      Reply
  8. Codrut Turcanu says

    April 17, 2018 at 4:25 am

    It’s sad to hear about Toto, God bless him!

    Reply
    • Ways Of Style says

      April 20, 2018 at 10:08 am

      Amen! Thank you so much!!!
      XO
      Aimara

      Reply

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OH, HI THERE!

Hi guys! My name is Aimara and I’m the voice behind Ways of Style.

I created this Blog as a space to express my thoughts and life experiences while wearing cute outfits of course! At the same time I want to encourage you to always be yourself, without caring what the world thinks about it.

I believe that we all have a specific purpose in life, but you can only find it by being 100% you and following your heart & intuition. In May 2014 I came to this country with a dream and with all my belongings in a suitcase, with nothing but determination to make it happen.

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Hi 👋🏻 it’s been a while. After dealing wi Hi 👋🏻 it’s been a while.

After dealing with how the new year started, I really didn’t feel like posting, so I deleted IG for a little bit for mental health purposes. The last thing I posted was on Jan 6th and after confronting a ton of senseless haters defending what happened I was so exhausted. Emotionally drained actually. (I know it was my mistake to try to deal with crazy people, but I was upset and couldn’t help myself 🙈)

On top of that, my beautiful baby niece Elisa, was born on Dec 26th, but spent over 2 weeks in the NICU having good days and bad days. She is thankfully home & healthy now, but boy was that scary 🙈 

Anyways, that’s what’s up. I’m ok now. Feeling a lot better and trying to get back to things little by little. Hope you guys are doing ok too ❤️

Have an amazing weekend!! See you soon 😘😘
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From no pants and no shoes to double pants and dou From no pants and no shoes to double pants and double masks BUT still smiling 😆
Disclaimer: I’m not wearing a mask at the beach because it was basically just us, so be cool.

I’m so happy it’s been in the 30’s, because this is the coldest we can handle 😂 Thank you Chicago 🙏🏻❤️

Hope everyone’s having a nice week so far! We got our test results back negative so I can finally see my family ❤️ It’s a good day today 🙏🏻
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A black t-shirt 🖤 Styled with a maxi skirt, @sp A black t-shirt 🖤
Styled with a maxi skirt, @spanx leggings and black skinny jeans 😊
Another basic piece you should definitely have in your closet because you can wear it with basically any bottom or layer it in any way you want!

I’ve been living out of a suitcase for the past 3 months and even though my wardrobe is not super exciting, I’ve managed to have fun with what I have. I basically have 7-8 different bottoms, 6 basic neutral t-shirts, a couple of sweaters and a button down shirt. That’s it!

It’s been ok too because I haven’t been anywhere, so I really have no reason to dress up 😂
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One of my happiest moments of 2020 by far! I freak One of my happiest moments of 2020 by far! I freaking did it! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

I don’t often take the time to be proud of myself but today I’m doing just that ❤️
We’ve been talking about getting certified for scuba diving since forever, but this past December we decided to finally go for it. 

Why?
Because this was one thing we were going to do on our trip around the world and since the trip has been postponed until God knows when, we felt like we needed to do something to cheer ourselves up.

I didn’t think it was going to be this hard. I’m not used to face my fears like this or to push through when I feel like quitting, but this time I was determined. I think the @hellofears book made a huge impact in me. Now I promise myself to keep learning new tricks and to push myself outside of my comfort zone as often as I can. Enough of talking about doing things and let time pass by and not do anything at all. Enough of that!

What’s next? Well right now, we are in Chicago until January 30th, but we’ll spend February and March in Boca & Tampa (and then back to the Midwest!), so we already signed up for freediving & windsurf! Both extremely challenging, mentally and physically, but what the hell, we are going for it anyways!

I encourage you to think about some of the things (big & small), you’ve been talking about doing forever and somehow life got in the way and you kept postponing them. Write them down and challenge yourself to do it. Make yourself proud. There’s no better feeling! Just do it for you!

Even though I’m not writing resolutions this year (I always have, but I felt like the universe betrayed all of us in 2020 💔)I’m making a permanent change in my life: push myself, be brave and open the door for new feelings and emotions to arrive. I’ve been living way too comfortable for way too long!

Special thanks to Eric (@globaldiverscuba) for being so kind and patient and of course @diveforcee for being the best scuba store in south Florida. We found them on Google and they were amazing! Can’t recommend them enough!! 💙
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Counting the days to see my girls!! Hi 👋🏻 W Counting the days to see my girls!!

Hi 👋🏻 We are currently quarantining in Chicago! We ran into a few very unpleasant issues with our new Airbnb (surprise surprise!), but we got over pretty quickly! Proud of us for doing that 😉

Yesterday I tried to sit down to write down goals for 2021 and honestly, after the crappiest year of all I felt like it was pointless. There’s so little I can control and the only thing I have the power to change is my mindset. 

How do you guys feel about 2021? Hopeful? I’m really trying to have no expectations because this past year has been so devastating that I don’t want all my hopes and dreams to be crushed again 💔 2020 is not exactly ending on the happy note we hoped for as a family, so I’m really hoping all this bad energy to be washed away tonight! #bye2020

Who knows what awaits... so for the first time ever I won’t write any resolutions, just trying to stay positive and faithful to the one who knows better 🙏🏻 How about you?

I wish you the best for 2021 though! It’ll be a party of 2 for us, eating some Venezuelan food and some wine 🍷
Happy New Year’s Eve! ❤️
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Location: @thehappygarage in Ravenswood ☺️
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Hi guys 🖤 Sorry I’ve been MIA, but I usually Hi guys 🖤
Sorry I’ve been MIA, but I usually take this time of the year to disconnect from social media and allow myself to dream and think about new year goals without being influenced by everyone’s highlight reels.

It’s been an unusual year for sure and even though I can’t wait for it to be over, I’m also forcing myself to take the time to appreciate the lessons I learned. I received a lot of bad news this year, but this last month it’s been good. So good, that it almost made me forget about the past 11 where I felt I was living in an emotional roller coaster. I’m very happy to be here in Florida and challenging myself to learn new things. I feel so brave and that’s a feeling I never want to deprive myself of. Ever again.

I’ll share more later, but today I’m mostly posting to wish you a safe Christmas this year. In whichever way you decide to celebrate, I hope you find joy in the little things ✨

I didn’t do any of my treasured Venezuelan traditions this year, but I did have hallacas yesterday (they are the best, and you have to order them with enough time to @meencanta.21), tonight we are having Indian food and tomorrow, we’ll do dinner at G’s sister. We leave to Chicago on Sunday, so we are making sure to spend a lot of time outside in the next few days ❤️

Anyways, take care beautiful people. Can’t wait to catch up soon! Merry Christmas to all who celebrate 🎄
...
#waysofstyle #merrychristmas #december #floridavibes #beachbum #lifestyleblogger #beachvibes #goodvibes #bestwishes #besafe #brave #happiness #instafashion #mystyle #resortlooks #vacationmode #summersalt #savethefishies #gosummersalt #christmaseve
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Hi 👋🏻 it’s been a while. After dealing wi Hi 👋🏻 it’s been a while.

After dealing with how the new year started, I really didn’t feel like posting, so I deleted IG for a little bit for mental health purposes. The last thing I posted was on Jan 6th and after confronting a ton of senseless haters defending what happened I was so exhausted. Emotionally drained actually. (I know it was my mistake to try to deal with crazy people, but I was upset and couldn’t help myself 🙈)

On top of that, my beautiful baby niece Elisa, was born on Dec 26th, but spent over 2 weeks in the NICU having good days and bad days. She is thankfully home & healthy now, but boy was that scary 🙈 

Anyways, that’s what’s up. I’m ok now. Feeling a lot better and trying to get back to things little by little. Hope you guys are doing ok too ❤️

Have an amazing weekend!! See you soon 😘😘
...
#waysofstyle #lifeupdate #chicagoblogger #chicagoinfluencer #meijerstyle #leopardprint #lifestyleblogger #quarantinelife #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #beingreal #friyay #happyfriday #weekendvibes
From no pants and no shoes to double pants and dou From no pants and no shoes to double pants and double masks BUT still smiling 😆
Disclaimer: I’m not wearing a mask at the beach because it was basically just us, so be cool.

I’m so happy it’s been in the 30’s, because this is the coldest we can handle 😂 Thank you Chicago 🙏🏻❤️

Hope everyone’s having a nice week so far! We got our test results back negative so I can finally see my family ❤️ It’s a good day today 🙏🏻
...
#waysofstyle #chiberia #chicagoblogger #chicagowinter #grateful #chicagoinfluencer #winterstyle #winterlook #puffercoat #smallvictories
A black t-shirt 🖤 Styled with a maxi skirt, @sp A black t-shirt 🖤
Styled with a maxi skirt, @spanx leggings and black skinny jeans 😊
Another basic piece you should definitely have in your closet because you can wear it with basically any bottom or layer it in any way you want!

I’ve been living out of a suitcase for the past 3 months and even though my wardrobe is not super exciting, I’ve managed to have fun with what I have. I basically have 7-8 different bottoms, 6 basic neutral t-shirts, a couple of sweaters and a button down shirt. That’s it!

It’s been ok too because I haven’t been anywhere, so I really have no reason to dress up 😂
...
#waysofstyle #capsulewardrobe #fashionblogger #howtostyle #whattowear #basiclook #classicstyle #maxiskirt #blacktshirt #chambrayshirt #whitesneakers #blackskinnyjeans #chicagoblogger #chicagoinfluencer #midwestblogger #meijerfinds #meijerstyle
One of my happiest moments of 2020 by far! I freak One of my happiest moments of 2020 by far! I freaking did it! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

I don’t often take the time to be proud of myself but today I’m doing just that ❤️
We’ve been talking about getting certified for scuba diving since forever, but this past December we decided to finally go for it. 

Why?
Because this was one thing we were going to do on our trip around the world and since the trip has been postponed until God knows when, we felt like we needed to do something to cheer ourselves up.

I didn’t think it was going to be this hard. I’m not used to face my fears like this or to push through when I feel like quitting, but this time I was determined. I think the @hellofears book made a huge impact in me. Now I promise myself to keep learning new tricks and to push myself outside of my comfort zone as often as I can. Enough of talking about doing things and let time pass by and not do anything at all. Enough of that!

What’s next? Well right now, we are in Chicago until January 30th, but we’ll spend February and March in Boca & Tampa (and then back to the Midwest!), so we already signed up for freediving & windsurf! Both extremely challenging, mentally and physically, but what the hell, we are going for it anyways!

I encourage you to think about some of the things (big & small), you’ve been talking about doing forever and somehow life got in the way and you kept postponing them. Write them down and challenge yourself to do it. Make yourself proud. There’s no better feeling! Just do it for you!

Even though I’m not writing resolutions this year (I always have, but I felt like the universe betrayed all of us in 2020 💔)I’m making a permanent change in my life: push myself, be brave and open the door for new feelings and emotions to arrive. I’ve been living way too comfortable for way too long!

Special thanks to Eric (@globaldiverscuba) for being so kind and patient and of course @diveforcee for being the best scuba store in south Florida. We found them on Google and they were amazing! Can’t recommend them enough!! 💙
...
#waysofstyle #divers #scubadivers #floridadiving #lifestyleblogger #wedidit #proud #pushyourself #chicagoblogger #chicagoinfluencer #hellofears
Counting the days to see my girls!! Hi 👋🏻 W Counting the days to see my girls!!

Hi 👋🏻 We are currently quarantining in Chicago! We ran into a few very unpleasant issues with our new Airbnb (surprise surprise!), but we got over pretty quickly! Proud of us for doing that 😉

Yesterday I tried to sit down to write down goals for 2021 and honestly, after the crappiest year of all I felt like it was pointless. There’s so little I can control and the only thing I have the power to change is my mindset. 

How do you guys feel about 2021? Hopeful? I’m really trying to have no expectations because this past year has been so devastating that I don’t want all my hopes and dreams to be crushed again 💔 2020 is not exactly ending on the happy note we hoped for as a family, so I’m really hoping all this bad energy to be washed away tonight! #bye2020

Who knows what awaits... so for the first time ever I won’t write any resolutions, just trying to stay positive and faithful to the one who knows better 🙏🏻 How about you?

I wish you the best for 2021 though! It’ll be a party of 2 for us, eating some Venezuelan food and some wine 🍷
Happy New Year’s Eve! ❤️
...
Location: @thehappygarage in Ravenswood ☺️
#waysofstyle #proudauntie #newyearseve #noresolutions #bye2020 #chicagoblogger #chicagophotographer #chicagoinfluencer #mygirls #myeverything #hope #faith #love #hopeful
Hi guys 🖤 Sorry I’ve been MIA, but I usually Hi guys 🖤
Sorry I’ve been MIA, but I usually take this time of the year to disconnect from social media and allow myself to dream and think about new year goals without being influenced by everyone’s highlight reels.

It’s been an unusual year for sure and even though I can’t wait for it to be over, I’m also forcing myself to take the time to appreciate the lessons I learned. I received a lot of bad news this year, but this last month it’s been good. So good, that it almost made me forget about the past 11 where I felt I was living in an emotional roller coaster. I’m very happy to be here in Florida and challenging myself to learn new things. I feel so brave and that’s a feeling I never want to deprive myself of. Ever again.

I’ll share more later, but today I’m mostly posting to wish you a safe Christmas this year. In whichever way you decide to celebrate, I hope you find joy in the little things ✨

I didn’t do any of my treasured Venezuelan traditions this year, but I did have hallacas yesterday (they are the best, and you have to order them with enough time to @meencanta.21), tonight we are having Indian food and tomorrow, we’ll do dinner at G’s sister. We leave to Chicago on Sunday, so we are making sure to spend a lot of time outside in the next few days ❤️

Anyways, take care beautiful people. Can’t wait to catch up soon! Merry Christmas to all who celebrate 🎄
...
#waysofstyle #merrychristmas #december #floridavibes #beachbum #lifestyleblogger #beachvibes #goodvibes #bestwishes #besafe #brave #happiness #instafashion #mystyle #resortlooks #vacationmode #summersalt #savethefishies #gosummersalt #christmaseve
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