Sounds aggressive right?
But really, who do you think you are? What do you think of yourself?
Why do I feel the need to talk about this? Because we are getting real around here and I don’t know the exact answer to that question anymore. I mean, I know I’m strong, smart and independent or at least that’s what I tell myself, but lately, I don’t feel like I’m acting like a strong, smart, independent woman.
I’m going through something and I don’t know exactly what that something is. I’ve been giving it a lot of thought and maybe, just maybe, it has to do with the fact that I’m turning 30 in a few months and my life looks nothing like I thought it would be. And by nothing I mean nothing! (Financially, professionally, personally). Or maybe it has to do with the fact that people are killing each other in my home country (Venezuela – Read about it here). Or maybe it has to do with the fact that my very best friend (aka my sister Alicia) is back there (in Venezuela) where people are dying everyday, with the two girls I love the most in this world (my nieces) and I don’t know when I’ll see them again. Or could it be that I’m not even sure of this blog anymore and I’m actually thinking of going back to a full time job? Or maybe because I sometimes feel the expiration date on my dad’s life because he’s sick? Who knows right?
While all of this happens I still have to create ‘pretty’ content and post regularly on Instagram, so people think I have the coolest job in the world and that everything’s fucking fine. Well, it’s not.
This is not by any means a negative post or a rant, I just felt the need of having some real talk and spark a conversation about who do you think you are. Especially when life doesn’t go your way. Do you give up easily? How do you handle yourself when everything that can go wrong actually goes wrong? Who do you think you are when shit goes down?
I think a lot of myself. First, and most importantly, I am blessed. I consider myself lucky, and for the most part I try really hard to live a positive life. But, some days, like today, I feel bad and I feel like giving up on everything and just sell all my belongings and buy a ticket to that lonely island with a palm tree that people used as a computer wallpaper back in the day, and sit there alone, forever, with a beer and just stare at the horizon. But that’s not real life, is it? That’s not being an adult. And to you my lovely readers, who according to Google Analytics are 70% under the age of 25, take some advice from this old lady. Here’s what I’ve learned:
- When it comes to being brave, no one can tell the difference when you’re just pretending. So, even when you’re afraid, always pretend to be brave. Always.
- One of the biggest skills you can develop for yourself is to focus on what’s keeping you together, not on what’s tearing you apart. (Note to self: Need to focus on this right now)
- It’s perfectly OK to have bad days, but don’t let a bad day make you think you have a bad life. Remember that being down and sad and angry and disappointed, builds character and there’s not a better feeling in this world than surviving a rough patch. Nothing beats feeling high after you’ve been low. Nothing.
- Find something that works as therapy for you. For me, it’s writing. Hence this article, that I’m sure I’ll want to erase in a week (But I won’t). Although I wish my way of dealing with things was working out instead of eating mac & cheese and pizza while binge watching the Gilmore Girls. God knows I’d be in much better shape. Anyway, find out what works for you.
And this one, God this one is the most important one of all…
- Surround yourself with the right people. The people that believe in you and your dreams, especially when you can’t see them yourself. The people that will bring you back to life. The ones that will tell you all the things that you need to hear, even when you don’t want to. The ones who share your vision and go out of their way just to see you smile and the ones who will clean up your tears when you don’t feel like smiling. Find people to do stuff with because we were not created to be alone and the things you end up doing with your life aren’t going to be nearly as interesting or important as who you do them with.
I really needed to be reminded all of this today… Seriously. Writing is so powerful to me. I don’t know how I really feel until I write it down. It’s crazy!
Well guys, I hope this post helps!
Have a great weekend and thank you so much for stopping by. If it’s not too much to ask please share some advice that you consider valuable. I would love to hear how you cope with things and who do you think you are when things aren’t going right.
Sending much love your way!
This post is dedicated to all my loved ones, friends and family. Thank you so much for keeping me grounded.