Hello everyone! Today is my birthday! YAY!

I can’t even begin to express the amount of emotions I’m experiencing right now! Today I’m turning 30 and my life looks nothing like I had planned, that’s why I wanted to write a little letter to myself about what I learned during my 20’s and what I look forward to for this new decade. So join me, would you?

I was just reading the post I wrote last year for my birthday and I feel like I’m a whole new different person today. It’s crazy how much someone can change over a year and how things change when you are positive & optimistic and just grateful to be here… grateful for being alive. I started my 29th year of life full of hope and happiness, because I was finally over my divorce, and now I’m even happier than I was then, which is pretty incredible because I didn’t think it was possible.

After moving to a different country with NOTHING but hope, getting a divorce and spending a year and a half trying to figure out who I was after it ended, things all the sudden changed after I turned 29. I met the person who I think is my soulmate, I’m doing what I love for a living, my sister is finally moving to Chicago (I haven’t seen her in over two years!) and I’m surrounded by the most amazing family & group of friends who have my back at ALL times. I have all the things I’ve prayed for. At least most of them.

However, it hasn’t always been like that. Unfortunately, I learned all my important life lessons during my late 20’s and I really wish I knew some of these things earlier in life. I’m sharing them because I don’t want the same thing to happen to you.Β That’s why I came up with this post about all the ‘Lessons I learned during my twenties’ from start to finish! Hope it helps!

Ready? Here we go!

  • It’s ok to be you & to put yourself first. I lost my identity during my twenties. I studied the wrong career, got married way too young, had some friends that weren’t good for me, amongst many other things. Don’t do that to yourself. Do what you love, put yourself first. If you’re not happy with yourself and with what you do, you will not find happiness anywhere else. It’s ok to be you. Understand that if there are people in your life that are not ok with who you really are, they should not be in your life to begin with.
  • Being alone is actually pretty cool. I spent most of my 20’s in a relationship that started when I was 15 and when it didn’t work out as I expected, I freaked out. I had no idea how to be alone. I literally wanted to die. It was my first and only heartbreak and it was horrible! I couldn’t stop crying or get myself together. It took me a while to realize that despite losing my best friend and having a major life change, what I was really afraid of, was being alone. After realizing that, I decided to spend time by myself and learned how to love who I am. It has been the best decision I’ve made so far!
  • Family really is everything. Don’t ever doubt that. And by family, I not only mean blood relatives, but those friends that become like family too. Value them, cherish them. They will be the ones standing next to you when you’re down and they will also be there to lift you back up. Don’t push away the people who love you the most and listen to them. They only want what’s best for you.
  • What other people say, really does not matter. In the end, it is your life. You choose who’s a part of it and who’s not, so choose these people wisely. Make sure everyone in your life is helping you become a better person every single day and only care about the opinion of the people you love and that love you the same way. These are the ones who truly care about your happiness.
  • It’s definitely OK to start thinking about your future and save money. Oh this one… No, you are not too young to start thinking about your future, and no, it’s not OK to think that a wealthy spouse will take care of you. Maybe you’re lucky enough to have someone else cover your finances and that’s completely fine, but in case no one does, you should definitely start thinking about your retirement in your early 20’s. Please don’t ignore this one like I did hahaha. I don’t owe any money and that’s good, but I also do not have any savings! I’m starting to get better at this though. It’s never too late.
  • Material things are not that important. If I would have known this, I would have savings! Don’t get me wrong on this one, it’s ok to own and buy things, but when not having them takes happiness away from you, these things OWN YOU, and not the other way around. Be mindful about what you spend your money on and what need you’re trying to cover, that’s all. I felt like I needed a lot of things because I wasn’t happy with many aspects of my life and I thought that having more tangible things, was going to replace the lack of intangible ones and of course, I was very wrong.

Too much? I know, it was a crazy decade. However, I did learn A LOT of lessons! Most of them the hard way, but what can I do about that?

As for what I’m looking forward in my thirties? I’m kind of excited to experience what people say is the best decade, even though I’m having a hard time accepting that I’m not a 20 something anymore LOL. No, but really, all jokes aside, I can’t wait to see what’s next for me. I have faith it will be another decade full of experiences and moments that will continue to teach me how to be better and what my journey on this earth is really about.

Which, just to be clear, has nothing to do with the picture below hahaha

Lastly, I just want to say thank you! If you’re reading this post it means you’ve been a part of my journey over the past 2-3 years, or if you just recently discovered this blog I’m extremely grateful for you too! It means the world to me to be able to share my thoughts, feelings and outfits in this space called ‘Ways of Style’, and I do not take for granted how blessed I am for having you guys, my friends and family supporting my every move.

Thank you for being a part of my journey! Cheers to 30!

My best year so far! I say this every year πŸ˜‰

Love you all!


PS: Another lesson learned… Dating apps are not that bad hahahaha

This is my love. His name is Gordon and we met on Tinder almost a year ago! He’s my rock and he’s becoming my roomie real soon. I’m so excited to start living this new decade with such a beautiful soul by my side.

I’m the lucky one.

*Insert heart-eyes emoji*

Photo credit: My friend @yosmertmphotography

He’s pretty awesome, so if you need a photographer in Chicago, make sure to call him or follow him on Instagram.

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Showing 38 comments
  • VALE

    What you have learnt and accomplished so far is huge dear Aimara! You are a beautiful, humble and smart girl, and deserve the very best. And look how cute are the two of you! A big hug from your Italian friend, Valeria

  • kalli

    Happy Birthday! it looks like you had a lots fun for your celebrating

  • Maryam

    Happy birthday darling! 30 is a great age and here comes the best years of your life. You finally know who you are and everything becomes much better. Keep on celebrating!

    xx, Maryam

  • Jessica

    Happy belated birthday! Thank you for sharing your wisdom with us. It’s very refreshing when you get to look back and see how much you have changed and grown for the better. I really enjoyed your post. Xo, Jessica

  • Sheree

    Aw Aimara, this post makes me so happy, I wish I had learned as much as you did when I turned 30 (many years ago) I remeber I didn’t even want to celebrate because it means that my 20’s is official over and that I need to “adult for reals”. You have so much maturity and life and vibrancy in you and can see that you are really enjoying what you do with blogging. How sweet that Gordon and you met on Tinder, my husband and I met on Match and here we are, married with two kids! So cheers to your 30’s and new roomie!

    xo Sheree

  • Rachel Holliday

    Happy belated birthday my lovely! You and your man are so adorable! This post was really inspiring to read, it can’t have been easy going through a divorce so young and to see that you got through it and are now happier than ever is so wonderful πŸ™‚ Haha I need to start thinking about my retirement fund- it’s so funny that we don’t tend to think about this in our 20s even though it is so important!

    Rachel xx

  • Wanderlustts

    It’s really inspiring seeing how far you’ve gone. I guess it goes to show that something that might seem like a dead end sometimes ends up being a blessing in disguised. You went through so much, and came with absolutely nothing and look how far you’ve gone!
    i’m still in my 20s and i gotta say as much as i hate to admit it, you are so right about NOT spending / worrying so much about material things. I guess theres just something we gotta go through ourselves haha!
    Also congrats on hitting 30! I’m so surprised you don’t look a day past 21 to me!


  • the luxe edition

    ah love this post! the big 3-0 happy birthday! i love how youve titled it “this is 30”

  • Natalia k

    First of happy 30th birthday!
    You are a beautiful soul and I loved this heartfelt post from you.
    I’m so glad that it all worked out for you in your 30’s,I’m in my 30’s too and I also wish I had learned those life lessons earlier,hello savings etc
    But I guess when we grow older we grow wiser.
    Natalia k

  • Michelle

    Happy Birthday! 30s are the best! 20s are all about figuring things out and angst and you really get to know yourself if your 30s – and I finally felt a sense of calm.. And great tips! I didn’t figure some of those out till my 40s LOL. I still can’t get over that you met your BF on Tinder! You’re one of the lucky ones!

  • Kamen Kamenov

    Oh my oh my the 30 mark…. happy happy happy birthday my darling…. so sorry it comes a bit delayed, but from the bottom of the heart. I really had to smile as I was reading this….since there were so many things I could find myself thinking at that age. I wish you that all your dreams come true… if u work hard u will earn the results . Xoxo

  • Eliza

    Wow, girl! Happy Birthday, that’s so exciting! I hope things turn into the best way possible for you. There are a lot of things left to learn and to see, but some of them you’ve already mentioned. But all in all, being yourself and put yourself first is the most important one. Keep it up, honey, and everything is going to be better than you could ever imagine!

    Cheers, Eliza |

  • Helen Chik

    Firstly happy 30th lovely lady!! Dirty thirty πŸ˜‰ Most people have told me your life truly begins at 30 so yours is just starting. I’ve almost come from a similar past as you and got divorced two years ago and found my soulmate on Tinder! You two are adorable and those life lessons are truly so important and a right of passage for everyone growing up.

    I especially love the one where you learn that being alone truly isn’t bad and so necessary sometimes to find who you truly are.

    How inspiring you are and I hope this year is just as amazing!!

    Helen xx

  • Diana

    Wow, to hear that you been married in your young age was quite shocking. It is true, you can’t know person by just seeing pictures on social media. But I love how positive you are about everything that happened to you. I am very happy you found your soulmate, friends and most important you are going to see your sister. My sister just recently visited me and i totally understand your feelings.

  • Aldora

    OH WOW! You look so happy and happy belated birthday hun! I’m 30 this year too but not exactly looking forward to passing the 30s mark haha.. I feel much better now after reading your blog post – it’s so insightful from a 30-year-old *hehe* And wow, I gotta start exploring Tinder in case my hubs ain’t working well for me *jk*! Hope you enjoyed your birthday celebration with your loved ones πŸ˜‰

    xx Aldora

  • Brown Eyed Toast

    AWW happy belated birthday gorgeous! OK first of all, it needs to be said – you do NOT look like you’re 30 at all!!! I hope that put a little smile on your gorgeous face πŸ˜‰ And a huge kudos to you for everything you have experienced and persevered through over the past decade. As heartbreaking as the divorce may have been, it sounds like you are such a stronger and wise person for the better of it! All of your life lessons definitely hit home for me, and it’s clear you have gained so much great wisdom from your experiences πŸ™‚ Now that you’ve gone through all that, I wish you all the love and happiness for your next decade!

    xo Soo |

  • Jacqueline

    Awww happy birthday girl! Love reading this post and all the things you’ve learned in the last year! I think your 20s is a defining decade where you learn all this stuff. And while we wish we would have known all these things before I think life molds us to become who we are through experience. I’m glad that you are doing something you love and hopefully how found someone to share your life with!

  • Open Kloset

    Hey Dear,
    How you?
    Happy Birthday Darling, so Good to read this Post:)
    I hope you had Amazing Day and I wish you All the Best:)
    The Photos are super cuteeee:)
    Wish you Amazing Day
    Love Open Kloset By Karina

  • Vanessa

    Happy Birthday gorgeous! Wishing you all the best! After learning a lot of the 20’s you are jumping into one of the best stages of life. 30’s is the best decade. So, enjoy your life to the fullest in this chapter of your life. I love reading all the points you’re sharing, it’s beautiful! I agree, family is the best and what other people say, really does not matter. You have to enjoy and do whatever that makes you happy, because happiness should be the life’s purpose.
    You look so amazing.


  • Mnada

    My friend! I hope you had an absolutely beautiful and memorable birthday! The picture of you and your beau is one of the most, I don’t know exactly how to describe it, but naturally easy pictures of a couple I’ve seen on IG. You both look so in love! I loved hearing your wisdom. I’m turning 28 next week and my 20’s, thus far, has been kind of a bit all over the place and I think some of the things you’re discussing, you don’t really realize until your in your thirties or about there and I think that also may be why people say it’s the best decade. I’ve spoken to women even in their forties that say they would NEVER go back to their 20’s if they could because they are so in tune with who they are and all the wisdom that comes with age, they would never want to feel the insecurities they felt in their early twenties! I didn’t know you went through a divorce and I’m sorry that relationship didn’t work out, but I think you are truly wise to realize that you had a fear of being alone and in moving forward, you learned to be okay with being alone. I have watched family and friends destroy themselves moving from one bad relationship to another because of that fear! Also, keep the skin secrets coming because GAH you look like a teenager (in a good way) πŸ˜‰

    Manda |

  • Gina Diaz

    Happy Birthday, Sweetie! aww, you are shining and you are radiating so much beautiful energy thru your pictures. Best wishes for much more great years to come!! thank you for sharing such an amazing post!

    xx. Gina

  • Lana

    Happy birthday, dear!! Wish you all the best! And thank you for this positive and real post! Your advice is great and I agree with everything. I am in my late 20’s now too, will be 30 after 1,5 year and I’m so exited, thanks God I control my life and know what I want.
    You are great person and I love your positive vibes! Be happy!

  • Candace

    Girl, Happy 30th! I am in shock that you aren’t still in your early twenties, as you don’t look a day older. I wish I had read your advice before now because I made some similar mistakes, including being afraid to be alone. It made me jump in so many relationships I didn’t need. I look forward to the content you bring us here in the future. I know all too well what doing what you want in your career really means πŸ™‚

  • Tandya

    Happy 30th beautiful! You are so brave and inspiring! Thank you for sharing this! I love all of your tips! Friends and family are everything, and I agree, it is okay to be selfish. I am turning 26 next month and I am finally realizing that I should do what I want, when I want and do what makes me happy.

    P.s. you and your boyfriend are the cutest!


  • Jessie

    First of all, Happy big 30th birthday babe!!! You look truly amazing and I can see happiness glowing from inside out! Thank you for sharing your personal experience and the lessons you’ve learnt over the past decade. I couldn’t agree with you with ‘It’s okay to be yourself and love yourself’ – If we don’t love ourselves, how can we expect others to love us. It’s definitely okay to spoil ourselves and give ourselves a break from time to time. I’m with you that it’s pretty cool to be alone! I love my solitude time from time to time! Sometimes we just need head space to reflect life by ourselves. Now you are in a new chapter of your life, wish you all the best for your new journey!

    xx, Jessie

  • Jennifer

    Hope you had the best birthday… and a wonderful year ahead!

    xo, Jennifer

  • Lisa-Jane

    Happy (belated) Birthday! It looks like you had a blast πŸ™‚ also thank you so, so much for sharing this. So personal and so much of it rang true for me. I’m divorced too and after I split with my ex husband I really wanted to spend some time figuring out who I really was and realised I hadn’t really not been in a relationship for over 10 years. So I made a vow to spend more time alone, and to be okay with it. So interesting that you experienced the same. Thanks for such an awesome post! X

  • Britta

    Happy birthday beautiful!!🎊🎊
    Turning 30 really isn’t that bad right?!πŸ˜‚
    Our twenties are where we learn who we are and really grow up!
    And I feel that you have grown so much with everything you have been through.
    I am so happy that you have made to the other side and found your true soulmate πŸ’–

  • Dannie

    Happy birthday, darling! I know it’s been a while since we’ve seen each other but I wanted to make a point to stop by and wish you a magnificent day. You’re a blogging inspiration and I love all the work you do. Cheers to a new decade and all the amazing things it will bring.

    P.S. Gorgon is amazing! Congratulations.


  • Thomas Falkenstedt

    Aimara, I was reading this like a big brother reads her little sister’s diary and nodded out of recognition at many points of your story when I realized the similar things we’ve gone through in life. When I got to the end and “met” Gordon I began crying. Maybe I should start using Tinder again too. I am 30+ by many years although I appear younger, so people usually don’t realize that, but just like you I basically “lost” my twenties due to many issues and it’s only now that I’m 30+ that I actually am living my life to the fullest and making my own decisions and doing what’s good for me. Welcome to the 30s and I can tell you’re already making the most out of your life. Keep enjoying it! <3

  • Bernice

    I hope you had the most wonderful dirty thirty! Thanks for sharing your wisdom from the past thirty years xx

  • Christine Kong

    Awww, happiest birthday to you! Turning 30 is one of the best years ever. Take it from someone who is already in her 30’s, it truly is the best decade of your life. Just like you said, you learned so much from your 20’s to now and when you are 30, you are just more confident of yourself, know what makes you happy, and start living your life the way you want to. I love all your tips because they are all very true and lessons to live by! I hope you had the best time celebrating! xoxo, Christine

  • Kirsten Wendlandt

    Happy Birthday Aimara!!! How is it on the other side of the big 30?!?! Like I said before you honestly don’t even look a day over 24 and I’m so jealous of that! I really enjoyed reading this post. It was so thoughtful and I love your list of things you have learned. I agree with them all 100%. Sounds like you’ve grown so much this year, you should be so proud of everything you’ve accomplished. I love reading your blog and can’t wait to follow another year!

  • Meg

    Omg happy birthday girl!! I love everything you shared. It seems like you have gone through and learned a lot in your 20s and it is so amazing that you shared it with us. Hope you had a great day!

  • Andrea

    Ways, you’re blessed and LOVED! You’re a beautiful princess with God’s plans ahead of you. Love you LOTS Aimarita jajaja πŸ™‚ xoxo, toto the first

  • Vivianne

    Happy birthday doll!! Things will only keep on getting better πŸ’“πŸŽ‰

  • Tavi J

    Love this and Happy Birthday fellow Leo! I’ll be turinig 33 and sharing a bday post soon. I def echo that 20’s were the year to learn the hard lessons and I’m still learning quite a few big one’s in my early 30’s. I think the best thing is to realize that YOU only have control over yourself and everything else will fall into place. Hope you have a fun time celebrating!

  • Genesis joly

    Amazing post, wishing you the best for your new decade! Happy birthday β€οΈπŸŽ‚

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